West Ham striker Michail Antonio has opened up about his struggles with mental health and falling out of love with football, which led him to seek therapy. The 34-year-old, who initially played for England before switching to represent Jamaica, discussed the impact of his divorce and childhood trauma on his well-being.
In a candid conversation on the High Performance Podcast with hosts Jake Humphrey and Damian Hughes, Antonio shared how these off-field issues left him feeling “mentally drained,” to the point where he found himself wishing for an injury just to avoid playing. “I just started disliking the game. I began therapy because I was really struggling with my divorce and other personal matters,” he explained.
Antonio described his emotional state after West Ham’s victory in the Europa Conference League final. While his teammates celebrated extensively, he felt overwhelmed and disconnected, opting to sleep instead of joining the festivities. “After we won, I couldn’t feel joy. I went back to the hotel and slept while everyone else was partying,” he said.
His challenges peaked around December 2022 when the enjoyment he once found in football had significantly diminished. Playing for Jamaica provided a temporary reprieve, but a serious medial ligament injury soon forced him to confront the potential end of his career.
The split with his wife, Debbie, whom he married in 2017, compounded his difficulties. Although West Ham and the Professional Footballers’ Association provided access to specialist counsellors, Antonio sought therapy independently. Initially sceptical about therapy, his perspective changed dramatically after starting sessions. “I used to think therapy was for crazy people, but it changed my life,” he admitted.
During therapy, Antonio faced his emotions directly, which led to a breakthrough where he found himself unexpectedly crying, a moment that brought him significant relief. He also reflected on his childhood, revealing how early betrayals had instilled a deep mistrust of others, affecting his ability to form close relationships.
Fair play to Antonio for opening up like he has. It just goes to demonstrate that anyone can have their troubles irrespective of status in life. It’s sometimes easy to look at ‘millionaire’ footballers not performing on the pitch and assume the worst. However, it just goes to show that a healthy bank balance and a flash care are no consolation when one’s family falls apart.
Agree entirely. He’s always come across as an open, opinionated person – a likeable trait – but it’s a different thing to explain to people that you’ve been struggling and to have the strength to seek help. It’s such a ‘taboo’ subject still, especially amongst men.
I was in therapy for 3 months. (My 3rd stint) I was in a group of 12. At the start there were 2 other guys. After the first month I was the only guy. Men are so reluctant to open up especially those of us who grew up with the “stiff upper lip” generation. I am 67.
At least I have my Hammers to cheer me up now and again. 😜
Well done Michail Antonio.
Underlines the fact that Mental Health is a constantly changing aspect of human beings that affects everyone, regardless of finances or success in life.
It would amaze me that with the phenomenal wealth in football, not all the players (Plus managers/coaches) access counselling therapy as part of self care and wellbeing.
Everyone deserves the Gift of Therapy.
Every man that comes forward, as Antonio has done, and describes their personal experience of therapy, in the public realm, is sure to break the stigma for other men and lead to them accessing the help they need. All power to him and all people out there, men and women, who are brave enough to seek the help they need. And to those who aren’t, i hope articles like this help to change that.